Weekly Top 5: Best State College Bars (and the worst)

This week our Top 5 list is the "Best Bars in State College."
Remember, this is just opinion!

Yeah, it's not football related, but people are down about the football business right now so we thought we'd do something that would be fun. Comment, criticize, whatever. You're probably going to hate us when we bash your favorite hang out later in this post.

The preview and BW Roundtable will also be up tomorrow.

Onward with the bars, from 5 down to 1.

5. The Lion's Den

We don't get there often, but we love the fact that you can be outside yet still be inside. It's a good place to go if the lines aren't halfway to The Deli. We like chilling in the basement where you can get away from the loud music upstairs if you need to. Oh, and they had hockey on TV when we went in during Blue/White Weekend. That's always a plus.

4. Sports Cafe

Okay so it's not the same Sports Cafe it was when we graduated in 06. It was great then because it was never all that crowded and, in most cases, whatever you wanted to see was on TV. It's not the kind of place you'd go if you wanted to drink, but it was a great place to go if you wanted to watch some obscure sporting event -- it seemed like they had every channel.

And what's better than sitting out on the patio at the end of spring semester? As long as that bearded homeless guy didn't try and reach across the wall and grab your nachos, it was a great place to be.

3. Pickles

We were skeptical the first time someone wanted to go to Pickle's. The first time we heard anything of it was when someone described it as "frat-tastic." Well, that label might be correct, but it's still a good place, and usually our number one choice to go watch games when we can't get into the stadium (which is almost every game). Multiple TVs, a big bar so you don't have to wait too long, good beer selection and a fair amount of seating as long as you get there relatively early. It's not generally a place we go for a night out, but its performances on Saturdays is good enough to land it at the number 3 spot.

Not a bad place to watch the game.

2. Beulah's/Bar Bleu

Most people probably haven't in Bar Bleu. But you know what? It's nice, it's clean, they have good drinks, lots of seating, lots of TVs, a pool table and you can talk inside without screaming! That's a lot of positives.

They also have those big 'ol fish-bowls for your mixed drink needs. Who doesn't love that? Add a half price happy hour from 9-11, which is perhaps the greatest time ever for a happy hour, and you can have yourself a nice start to your night.

We just like being able to go somewhere in that town where you can just chill out, since at most places, you can't -- it's just too loud and crowded.

And for clarity's sake, we usually hang out in the upstairs part, which we guess is technically Beulah's, but no one calls it that and neither do we.

1. The Phyrst

To most people, The Phyrst needs no explanation.

Between Table Wars, The Phyrst Family Band and Free Fry Night, it seems that the Phyrst is the place to be any day of the week. It's like hanging out in your basement because of the low ceiling and you're likely to break your knees trying to get in and out of those stupid picnic tables, but there's really no other place we'd rather be. Combine the seemingly nightly live music with the atmosphere and that Dark Side of the Moon you've been drinking from your personal stein, and the Phyrst is a clear-cut choice for number one. It's Graham Spanier approved.

If you're a student, you must get down there on St Patrick's Day and wait in line from 2am-6am. It was probably one of the dumber things we've ever done because those mid-March nights can get pretty chilly, but it was well worth it once we got inside.

The line to get in the Phyrst on St. Patty's Day, approximately 4:30 am.

Honorable Mentions: The Skellar (gotta love that crazy-eyed bartender by the pool table- we're pretty sure he never goes home) and the Crowbar. Yeah, we know the Crowbar has been closed for a while, but it's still holds a special place in our hearts. We liked it so much we made a facebook group.

And now, for the worst, from least suckage to most suckage.

5. The Saloon

Maybe some of you would disagree with us. It's obviously a wildly popular place, and yeah, we do enjoy the Monkeyboys as much as anyone else, but this was better when we were actually in college and didn't mind not being able to move and sweating our balls off. Now that we're out of school, the thought of standing in a 20-minute line just to be annoyed and not get a drink doesn't appeal to us anymore. Kudos to the bar since in snatched up Velveeta after the Crowbar closed, but that's not enough to pull us in.

4. G-Man

We're not going to lie, we've only been to the G-Man once, and that was only one of us. But that one time resulted in wild puking and a trip to the hospital with food poisoning because the wings. Bad times. Haven't been back since and don't plan on it.

3. The Gaff

Probably the weirdest place in town. Horrible music, really weird crowd, no real theme or feel to the place. Does that sound like a place you want to go to?

Pull that tap handle for bad times.

2. Cafe 210

We're not sure why people wait in lines so long to get into 210, but that alone is reason enough for us to dislike it. It's hard to think of a more boring place, but somehow people wait in line forever to get in there, and inevitably we make fun of them when we walk by. The Long Islands aren't that good.

1. The Cell Block

You know, I don't think we've ever been there, but since it replaced the Crowbar and isn't the Crowbar, we hate it. The Crowbar was the best. They had nickel nights, Velveeta, great shows coming through all the time. Just an awesome place, and every time we see Cell Block, which is now a shitty dance club, it kills us.

Special Honorable Mention- The Last Place In Town We'd Ever Attend Award: Indigo

Current Penn Staters know it as Indigo, but it will always be Players to us. There are a lot of reasons to despise this place. The unbelievably long lines to get in, the awful music pouring out of the open door, or because it's a gathering place for guys like these. But let's focus on the line, which is easily the most insane line in the history of State College. When the thing stretches down near The Diner, we're not sure why more people join it, but they always do. We secretly believe that no one ever gets inside. We've never really talked to anyone who's been in there. But one thing is fo sho: we'll never be inside. Enjoy the wait, we'll take cheap drinks and a seat at the bar somewhere else.

Top 5 Reasons College Football is Better Than the NFL

We had so much fun railing against the NBA in our Top 5 list, we've decided to make it a weekly event. Sometimes the lists will be about sports, sometimes they won't. Either way, think of them as a timeout from the insanity of BCS talk. Today we will run down the reasons that the nation's most popular overrated sport fails to live up to its college counterpart.

5. College athletes actually have something to prove.
In the college game, the players aren't millionaires. They're not playing to get a couple extra bucks from a bonus, they're playing just to win. To us, that makes all the difference. Unless you're one of the lucky few who will make it to playing on Sundays, there is nothing to gain from playing in college except winning. And in college you're winning for 100,000 of your best friends, not just whoever a bunch of marketers rounded up to watch a team in a city you're probably not even from.

4. The tailgate scene.
Yes, we know that people tailgate at pro games too. But have you ever been to one? Since NFL stadiums are generally located in pretty urban areas, tailgates always happen in some nondescript, lame-o parking lot. Too cold and industrial for us. We much prefer the all the different settings that college football provides for our tailgating needs (and the scenery is a little better at a college game, if you get what we're driving at). And obviously, if you want to hang out in a giant field and roam around with tens of thousands of your friends, Penn State is the place to be.

Yeah, that looks fun.

3. Style of play.
Before someone bashes this reason, we know, we know, the NFL players are faster and stronger, and that limits the types of offenses that can be run and college is so slow and blah blah blah. That's not our point. In the NFL, it's all the same. Sure, Miami busted out the Wildcat formation this year, and you might see a gadget play every once in a while, but generally the style of play in the NFL is pretty similar. But just think about college. You get to see the spread, the option, smash-mouth, Tebow's jump passes, and whatever the ACC is trying to pass off as offense. When it comes to style of play, we're equal opportunity fans: we love the diversity of the college game.

2. Stronger emotional ties to college teams.
For many people, your life at college was the best time of your life, and if you went to a big football school, half of every year was dedicated to the football team in that town. You are on that campus because you chose to be there and when the team takes the field, it's like you're right there with them. They represent the town, the school and most importantly, you.

It's exciting watching your hometown NFL team, but to us the pro game is too much of a business and not enough competition. The players are foreign and hard to cheer for.

When you're pulling for the college guys, you already have that strong bond because you both chose to attend that school.

1. The atmosphere at the stadium.
The lack of marching bands at NFL stadiums could be a reason all its own, but stadium atmosphere is more than just the band. It's the unique feel of all the college stadiums (vs. the sterile, cookie cutter feel of NFL stadiums). It's the fight songs, the rowdy students, the noise level and even the sheer number of people at a college game that sets it apart from a pro game. It may be a bit of an apples-to-oranges argument (mostly because pro fans can never match the intensity of a drunken student section), but attend one game of each and see which one is more exciting.

Top 5 Reasons The NBA Sucks

If you're thinking, "Why is a Penn State football blog writing about the NBA," well, we can't say we blame you. But it's bye week, there's little going on with the team, we're bored and we like Top 5 lists. If you hate the NBA- and if you're a college football fan, we think there's a relatively good chance that you do- consider this a break from having to read Bill Simmons' 7,500-word columns on how great it is.

5. The game is a side act to the player introductions.
There's more choreography in NBA pregame introductions than there is in a Chad Johnson end zone celebration (before this season anyway). We wish the players would use the effort they put into elaborate handshake routines into actually running on the court.

Is this really necessary?

4. The end of the game is the most boring part of the game.
You may be saying, "That's the case in any sport, if it's a blowout." And therein lies the rub: the NBA is actually less boring in a blowout then it is in a 5-point game down the stretch. Unless the score is within 3 points, the last 2 minutes is all fouling, free throws and timeouts and goes on for about half an hour. That's just an inherently dumb problem, and there's no getting around it.

3. No one plays defense. Ever.
Don't even try to argue against this. Watch a college basketball game and see how the team plays defense. Then watch an NBA game, and take note of how many open 3s guys get, because defenders are all too lazy to run out and get a hand in the shooter's face. People talk about great defenders in the NBA all the time, but don't buy into this; the "great" defenders just play less-crappy D than the average guys. Defense in the NBA is a total farce. And that's that.

Nice D, losers.

2. They refuse to play back to back nights in the playoffs.
Come on, ladies. High school kids play multiple games in a day sometimes during holiday tournaments. You're world-class athletes and you can't suck it up and play two nights in a row? How many nights off would these guys need if they stopped loafing around and actually played? Three? Five?

1. The pro basketball championship pales in comparison to the college basketball championship.
Hey, there are a lot of reasons why the NBA sucks, but how can you top this one? In what other sport is the college championship noticeably more exciting, more popular and flat-out better than it's pro counterpart? Ummm, none. The college tournament is great: 64 teams, 2 and a half weeks, you fuck up once and you're gone. The NBA? 16 teams over about two months (seems more like five) and all the excitement of a 2-hour history class on a Friday afternoon.

Bonus: Stephen A. Smith is prominently involved in the analysis of the sport.

"I LOVE THE UNIVERSITY OF PENN STATE, HOWWW-EVAHH, THIS BLOG IS TERR-A-BULL!" -Stephen A. Smith

Thank you, Stephen A.